On Friendship and Being Yourself

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SorceressCassandra's avatar
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Years ago, I had mentioned my thoughts on friendship and I really feel the need recently to talk about once more. No I don't plan on being that deep (it's 8:03 right now as I type this and I am a master and not getting up until 9:00 in the morning) nor do I plan on getting in this HUGE journal about it. I just really feel like expressing my thoughts on friendship- namely on the forming of friendships.
I'm of the opinion that real friendships are formed naturally. Sometimes they happen automatically. Sometime it happens over time. For me it's a bit of both- I've met friends that I've only talked to once or twice and they are instantly my friends, plus I have friends I've grown to consider friends after quite a bit of time. Thus it really makes me sad to see it when people try to force a friendship on someone. I know it sounds strange but it's happened various times in the past as well as recently.
When you try to force a friendship out of someone it's feels like someone you don't really know is trying to pressure you into telling certain personal things or do certain things with them under the guise of friendship. It's a pretty crappy feeling not just for the person whose feeling the pressure but the person whose putting the pressure on the other person. I'm sorry but I don't really think it's right. I don't do well with pressure from people I don't really know much less don't really feel safe with saying certain personal things about myself.
I also- personally- don't believe in being anyone else other then me (unless I'm acting while in cosplay but that's something else) when I'm online as well as off it, and acting all buddy buddy with a few people I've barely met- if I met them at all -feels like faking it and I just hate hate hate doing that. I lost track of the girls whom I watched do that in high school as well as suffered it when others did it to me. It drove me insane as well as really pissed me off. I know I hold those I don't really know or don't really speak to all that much at a distance but it's mostly cause I don't want to trouble you guys with stuff that I deal with as it's stuff that we all deal with sometimes and who likes to hear people bitch about it? Not many. Plus I don't want to seem like one of those whiny girls who complains on the internet about their life and their problems. I don't mind talking to certain people about that kind of stuff if to help relate to them and help them through a rough situation which we've all had sometime or another.
I also have dealt with my fair share of creepers in the past and they have both alarmed as well as disturbed me. Thus it takes time to earn my trust as well as my respect which are two vital things for friendships to form.
So I just CAN'T bring myself to be friends with someone just because they say go. Plus wouldn't you want to be friends with someone because they want to be friends with you as well? I kinda think so.
I'm not saying I don't want to be friends with you all or that I don't want to meet you all one day. Cause I do, I really really do. You guys are my muses, and my inspiration. You guys encourage me to do even better then before just like my friends among the various cosplay groups as well as my cosplay family. I'm just asking you all to be yourself if we ever meet or when we chat. I want to get to know you all as yourselves. You don't need to try to hard by commenting on my every tweet, Facebook status, tumblr post, or picture update. Just a small like or a note here or there means a lot to me and it's how I've met quite a few of my friends both in and out of cosplay. For me just a little effort goes a long way. Plus with just a random like or a little comment here or there is enough to make me smile and consider making you an internet friend. At least that's just me and that's what I think on the subject. We're all different and I respect that, I just ask that you respect my thoughts and wishes as well.

Proud founder of the cosplay family We *Heart* Cardgames Productions along with:
:iconmalindachan: :iconex-shadow:

We're not a club, we're a family.

"This is the team. We're trying to go to the moon. If you can't put someone up, please don't put them down"- NASA motto

"Courage is the magic that turns dreams into reality"
-Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World

"If you live on by believing in your own potential then you're bound to change the future"
-Izayoi Aki, Yu-Gi-Oh 5D's episode 140 :blackrose:

"My Friends are my power, and I'm theirs!"
-Ventus, Kingdom Hearts Birth By Sleep

"Life is all about resolve. Outcome is secondary. It is resolve that determines the value of your life."
-Okami
© 2012 - 2024 SorceressCassandra
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ThePoetryNinja's avatar
I can understand that. It seems to be common place on social networking sites to force yourself on people to become your friend. A lot of folks seem to think "the more friends I have, the more people will like me." The true fact of the matter is that even though you may consider them a friend, that however does not mean they feel the same thought. So as you have said and as I will say, when you wish to create friendship here in the social-networking world, make sure it means something and it is for the good of you and that person.